So, raise your hand if you are doing great, during the weirdest Teacher Appreciation Week ever.
Raise your hand if your house is clean, your heart is joyful, your belly is full of healthy foods, you are showered and dressed today, your brain is anxiety-free, you have exercised several days in a row, you are not angry at any politicians, neighbors, or family members, your students are ALL learning what they need to, and you aren’t worried about any of them.
Yeah me neither.
These times are hard. We keep saying unprecedented because there is literally. No. Precedent. Sure, there was the huge Influenza outbreak in 1917-1918, but they didn’t have Zoom back then. Or 24 hour new cycles. Or social media. Or toilet paper (I guess we don’t have as much of that these days either)
This is different. And it’s ok to recognize that life is different. It’s not just “Regular Life: At Home Edition”.
Let’s use my children (because they’re the ones in front of me) to look at kids as a whole.
I have a kindergartner and a 4th grader, but feel free to extrapolate this to middle and high school students who also have MUCH higher stakes (hormones, depression, graduation, etc.).
My kids can’t see their friends. They are supremely isolated, despite the fact that their entire lives are normally lived communally -- at school, at before-care, at church, at scouts, at sports, at other activities. Kids spend most of their lives in “piles” and “packs” of other kids.
So they’re withdrawing. My 4th grader is spending more time on the computer than necessary. And my kindergartner is spending more time playing by himself. I have to drag them to talk and play and do things.
Getting them to do or finish schoolwork is like pulling teeth despite the fact that there are TWO educated adults in this house working from home -- and ONE OF US IS A TEACHER!!!
They have lost their caring about schoolwork. Why?
Because as we all know, kids don’t work just because it’s “good for them”. They work because of relationships.
And right now those relationships are a lot harder to see.
Guess what?
Learning looks a whole lot less important when there isn’t even a teacher’s face to cajole them into it.
When there’s a pandemic going on. When there’s less food in the house than usual. When there’s no contact with other kids. When there’s no adults at school to notice that there’s a problem. When domestic violence is up. When neglect is rising. When depression is increasing exponentially. When kids are lonely and sad
Somehow, that assigned reading with the questions at the end doesn't seem that important to a kid with everything else going on. Especially if there’s no “you” (the teacher) in front of them to use the power of relationship to persuade them to do it.
Heck, if that were me, I might not not even login. Depression and isolation are powerful forces.
It is HARD to get motivated in the face of a pandemic. So says the disaster in my family room. So says my kindergartener who cries every time he has to do an assignment that he doesn't like (that doesn’t come with a video of his teacher to help him feel connected). So says my 4th grader who has no idea how to do time management (and neither do most of our middle and high schoolers). So says me, who is used to seeing the faces of my friends and colleagues.
So says our students who are lonely and isolated.
As you work through student grades, please be kind. Assume goodwill. Assume hardships that you don’t know about yet, not just in “those” households, but in any household. Please keep this unprecedented event in mind. Please keep the fact that you have no idea what’s happening behind closed doors and unlogged-in accounts. Please keep in mind that there are bigger events happening than a couple of assignments.
This is not “Tracy-from-the-district” giving you a policy. I don’t make policy. This is Tracy the mom. Tracy the teacher. Tracy who loves kids. Tracy who knows kids who can’t handle all this. Who knows parents who are struggling. Who knows teachers who are struggling.
And if you’re struggling, (as we ALL are) I hope you can get a chance to listen to the webinar that the amazing Ms. Darlene Rivers from Employee Wellness provided yesterday on Teams. She is so wise and helpful. Some of her advice for us was...
Keeping perspective
- Finding good in any bad situation
- Noticing when you are feeling stressed
- Breathing
- Focusing on things within your control
- Asking for help
- Following a schedule
- Making your bed daily
- Showering and putting on different clothes daily
- Sticking to a meal schedule
- Disconnecting from electronics and spend time with family
- Planning your time
- Staying CALM
- C- Coping skills (give yourself positive messages, engage in enjoyable activities, relaxation techniques)
- A- Be aware but not opposed (stay informed but limit the amount of news)
- L -- Listen to reliable sources of information (CDC, WHO)
- M - Monitor yourself -- eat well, exercise, get enough sleep.
This is still hard, even if we’ve (mostly) figured out Teams. It’s still hard, maybe getting harder despite some stores and beaches opening. It’s still hard for kids, most of whom are still isolated and scared and lonely
Don’t forget to keep that in mind as you continue to keep up your relationships with them (when they log in) and as you work through grades.
And PLEASE take care of yourself. You are essential workers with the craziest, fastest changes and moving targets. Your job is hard. I know. I see you working crazy hours.
I appreciate you so, so much. Please appreciate yourself this week by taking care of yourself. Happy (weirdest) Teacher appreciation week!! Please practice self-care, now, more than ever!!!
As always, email me any time. I love to hear from you all! newmantr@pcsb.org
-Tracy
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